Living and Leaving a Legacy

Both my grandmas passed away these last few weeks. Just a week apart from each other, at the ages of 93 and 94, and while I haven't even had the space and time to process it all, I have thought so much about their lives and the legacies they leave behind. Both such strong willed women with a beautiful frankness about them, neither of them ever shied away from speaking their minds. And I love that. And I want to live like that. And it's made me think about what type of legacy I want to leave behind and how I cultivate that today, here and now.

This last Tuesday, we had the burial and memorial service for my dad's mom, my Grandma Gladys. Thus, it's forced me to really think about who she was as a human being, who she was as a woman, and how deeply she loved and was loved by all those she encountered. And it's made me think about the mark she leaves on all of us, but the truth is, it's truly not the mark SHE has left, but the mark Jesus has left through her on all of us. You could hear that mark in every single thing that was said about her - all 4 of her sons spoke, and all of their words were laced with such deep gratitude for who she was, for the joy she brought into their lives, for the way she loved them so freely and fiercely.

My dad gave the eulogy and shared some beautiful things, but one of the stories he shared (and I'm sure I won't do it justice) was about a time his mom came to visit him in Maui when he was living there - my dad's out on a sailboat he was working on however many feet/yards from the beach and my grandmas hooting and hollering at him from a restaurant on the beach. She's waving her arms and hollering his name, and his friends are like who is that? And he's like, I think that's my mom. So naturally, he jumps off the boat and swims to shore to see her!

Peter and I talked about this story of the hollering mom and the son who jumps for about 30 minutes or more yesterday. And Peter just said it's the Gospel in a simple story, "I'm just not sure who Jesus is as it could go either way. Is He the one hollering and calling his name from the shore, or is He the one jumping off the boat?" And then this led into the most beautiful conversation about how we want to live, as a father/mother, as a son/daughter, as a husband/wife, as a follower of Christ. Are we unashamedly calling out His name from the shore? And are we willing to jump off the boat to swim to Him?

So many other beautiful things were shared by my uncles and cousins, and every single thing shared was laced with grief, joy, and so much laughter. One uncle shared about her legacy of faith and how the faith of future generations rests on her shoulders. And it's so incredibly true. So many of us know the Lord and have a relationship with Him BECAUSE of her, and it's so beautiful to think about the generations that will come to know the Lord in our family because of the seeds that were planted by this woman.

And my brother, sister and I got up to together to say a little something about her, something which I literally wrote in the wee hours the night before. And I'll share my thoughts below, but after the service, some random person came up to me and said that was the most Christ-centered memorial service I have ever been to! And I just thought, thank you Jesus, as I'm sure that would have been my grandmas prayer - that Christ would be honored and glorified through all of it, and my goodness, He most certainly was!

So I was just going to come up here and wing it, but then when I informed my husband of this, he kindly suggested I write out my thoughts ahead of time, probably to prevent me from keeping everyone here a little too long!!

Anyhow, as some of you may know, both my grandmas passed away within a week of each other. And it’s made me think so much about their lives and the legacies they leave behind, which has then caused me to think about what type of legacy I want to leave behind and how I cultivate that today, here and now.

And today, we gather together to honor my dear Grandma Gladys. And when I think about her I cry tears of tremendous joy knowing she's right where she wants to be, with her Father in Heaven, and she leaves the most beautiful legacy of faith behind in all of us. That woman sowed and planted so many seeds all for the glory of the Lord!!

When I think back to my grandma and the things she taught me, so much of it circles back to Jesus. And so much of my own faith journey starts with her.

I remember asking Jesus into my heart with her at the tender age of 6.

I remember her praying scripture and God’s truth over me, always.

I remember her anointing me with oil and my baby’s with oil as she blessed us and marked us for the Lord.

I remember her boldness and her beautiful frankness as she never shied away from speaking truth.

I remember telling my now husband that she most certainly didn’t have an accent, and then laughing upon their first encounter at the way she pronounced Mercedes. Okay, okay, I guess I was wrong!

I remember her laugh and her deep, deep love for her family.

I could go on and on and on with the things I remember and loved about her, but the one memory that truly transcends them all is just that the way that woman lived!

Christ had set her free, and she was free indeed, and when you were in her presence, you could hear that freedom laced throughout her words, you could see it in the twinkling of her eyes, and you could feel it with every bone in your body! And when you would leave her presence, you felt as though you had just had a visit from God Himself! And it was a true honor and privilege to witness the way she fully lived into that freedom.

And as I look out at all of you, I am reminded of the most beautiful legacy this woman leaves behind.

May we all take this opportunity to consider the legacies we want to leave behind, and may we be encouraged to cultivate that today, here and now, never forgetting that as long as we live and breathe, He’s not finished with us yet!

And to my grandma, Well done, good and faithful servant. What a full life you have lived all for His honor and glory! Until we meet again.

Irish Musings

So it's 6 AM here and I really should be sleeping, but I've been tossing and turning in bed for about an hour now and rather than just lay there and try to force myself to sleep, I figured I'd get out of bed and be a little productive before the house awakes.

This jetlag thing is real folks! I think I was kidding myself to just assume it wouldn't affect me all that much since my sleep is so disrupted with two littles. But every single time I put my kids to bed whether it's for a nap or for the night, I doze off for a short while. And I'm taking naps during the day!! What?? I didn't even know that was possible. I'm finally taking the advice to sleep when the baby sleeps! Who knew I had to travel all the way to Ireland to do that.

And I sit here in the quiet of the house, the calm before the storm. I know that today is going to be an emotional day. Not only due to the lack of sleep because every little thing seems to be heightened and Peter and I have been trying our best to consider this and cover each other with grace, but because today we are celebrating the life of Peter's Granny Sally.

Granny Sally went home to the Lord last week, and I can't even begin to tell you how much my heart aches for this sweet family. You guys she was such a little love and such a sweet blessing! This photo popped up on my facebook feed a few days ago. I think it was taken 4 years ago. And the joy she radiates in the photo is real and pure. And she loved her family something fierce. She would always fill you full of tea and biscuits and send you away with a hug and a kiss and crumbs on your face!

I was hoping she'd get to meet Ryan as she had met Jack two years prior, but alas the Lord had other plans! And for that I am thankful. He wanted her home with him, and I praise Him for that. However, it doesn't mean that you don't grieve and wish for just one moment with her. It doesn't mean that you don't miss her sweet little spirit or her Irish isms (God Love em!).

Yet amidst the grief there is joy. And I'm so thankful that we are here to do this together. To celebrate her TOGETHER as a family. To remember her TOGETHER as a family. Thank you Jesus for that, for your perfect timing. I'm so thankful Peter is here to do this with his family.

And even though I know death is inevitable for us all, the loss of a grandparent is hard. The loss of anyone is hard. However, as I type that, I can't help but think about the fact that I am 33 years old, and I have never been to a funeral. EVER. Well maybe I went to one when I was really really little, as one of my grandpas passed away when I was like 4, but I don't recall it at all. And my other grandpa passed away before I was even born. So the matriarchs remain and one of my grandmas did remarry before I was born, so he's really the only grandpa I've actually known.

Anyhow, the point is...death is inevitable, and as both of my grandmas are nearing their mid 90s, I'm left to reflect on their lives. So many years of life lived. So many tears and so much laughter and so much love. Yet, with each year of life, they are now losing a part of their old selves. And it's been hard to watch my parents witness the loss of their parent before they've even left this earthly world. It's been hard to watch them grieve for the person/parent they once were, for those lucid moments, for those good conversations, for those moments of sheer joy rather than those moments of pain.

And yet, as hard as it has been, it's made us all reflect on their lives and our own lives as we walk this path of aging...TOGETHER, with my grandmas, and God willing, with my parents. How can we love them, care for them, honor them in a way that brings honor and glory to God and to themselves? How can we do a better job of respecting them and seeing the value they still add to our lives and to this world even at the ripe old age of 90 something? And how can we do this well amidst a culture that may tell them otherwise?

And those are my Irish musings for today! So thankful for this time to just sit and reflect and write.

And if you're the praying type, I'd ask that you pray for my family today...that amidst the grief there will be joy, laughter and so much love.

Life and Death.

How many of you reading this have been to a funeral in the last year? In the last month? In the last week? How many of you have been to more than ONE funeral in the last year? In the last month? In the last week?

I am stating it here for all of you to read – I am 27 years old and I have never been to a funeral, well maybe just one when I was too little to even remember such events.

Although I have never been to a funeral, I understand fully that death is inevitable and a reality for us all. I hear about people dying here and there from old age or an illness. And don’t get me wrong it does impact me and demonstrates the reality of death. But DEATH has never felt so real to me as it did when we were in Africa.

Death is so common in Africa, it is nearly tangible. It can be felt around every corner and every bend. Just over the course of ONE month many COTN staff members were impacted by the death of a loved one. Some mourned the loss of a father, a daughter, or even a fellow coworker. It seemed as if people were always attending funerals. People frequent funerals as often as they may frequent a friend’s house.

Many of these people are dying due to malaria or HIV/AIDS. Malaria is as common in Africa as the common cold is in the states. During our time there many of COTN’s own children and staff members were admitted to the clinic to be treated for malaria.

These next few bits were taken from Peter’s entry on Upsidedownmotive.net. I want to make sure I give him credit for these beautiful words… “In Malawi, not only do many die giving birth or from HIV or from hunger but many are crippled by the scourge that is Malaria. Malaria in Malawi is so common that if you are sick you can nearly always presume it is malaria. Take one of the girls in the teen home in Chiwengo who has battled malaria 10 times, or the 6 month old child of a mutual friend who just lost their battle with malaria, or the girl from Chilombo who we drove to the ABC clinic. We met a COTN nurse who told us she sees a malaria sickened child at least one or 2 times a week. Death from malaria is one of the most tragic ways to die in Africa as it is avoidable at a very low cost. What would it take to cut deaths dramatically and in a matter of months? Nothing but nets- A simple mosquito net costing $10. Quinine, the drug used to battle malaria, costs $15 each time you have an outbreak. Do the Math yourself, nets are cheaper, nets are better, and nets are simple. COTN at Chiwengo is lacking nets. Some have nets, some do not, and some just don’t like them! Until we can have greater access to nets, Malawi will continue to struggle against malaria.”

Everyone in Malawi knows someone who has been touched by malaria in some way. It all kind of reminded me of a common disease we have in the states, a disease we like to call cancer. Everyone in the States knows someone who has been touched by cancer. Malaria or even HIV/AIDS is their cancer. And then it made me think why is cancer unheard of in Africa? Don’t get me wrong they have their own diseases and illnesses, but why is it that cancer is claiming the lives of thousands of people each year in the states? Makes you think doesn’t it…we may not have malaria, but we have our own set of diseases and problems that disrupt and destroy life. The only difference is theirs is called malaria while ours is called cancer.