Dear Jack {thoughts on preschool}

Dearest Jack,

It's a Monday and a holiday (wrote this weeks ago), so your school is closed and you're home with Ryan and I today! I love having you home with me.

We signed you up for a four day a week all day preschool which started in September, when we were under the assumption that a baby would be joining our family in February. I figured it would be nice for you to have something to do and somewhere to go while I held down the fort with a newborn and your 3 year old brother, but turns out a new baby won't be joining our family till the summer.

And my son, I cherish the days we have with you....I know Ryan does too.

You just went back to school after Winter break and it was hard for me to transition back to not having you around with us during the week. I know Ryan really missed his fellow fort maker, lego builder, and bike riding buddy because let's be real, I'm not really on the same playmate level as you are!

And it's eye opening for me to realize too that this is just the beginning of your years of school, of you not being in our home during the day five days a week. How is it possible that we've reached this point in your life? This point where we truly set you free out into the world, where you're meeting and making new friends whose parents I don't already know! It's exciting and just a little bit terrifying at the same time.

And I was nervous for this all to begin, for you to be there four days a week from 8:45 to 3:15, just like a regular school day, but you have transitioned so beautifully that it's made the trasition so easy on me. Your first day of school you just walked right into the room, put your bag away and just fully entered into the space and it was the first drop off at a new place that was just seamless. I remember thinking really, that was far too easy?? Doesn't he want like one more hug? Or maybe one more kiss? Does he realize I'm not coming back for awhile? But the truth is, I'm sure the day felt short to you as it's only 6.5 hours from drop off to pick up and it use to be like 9 hours at your old schools.

Just last week, I dropped you off a little late, and you walked into the room and the teacher and all your little buddies were calling your name and you dashed over to them with a coy little smile on your face before you even put your things away. And it was beautiful to witness.

And I just stood there thinking this is it, this is me letting you go again and again and again and again, setting you free into this world...to fly. I pray the world is kind to you and I pray you are kind to the world. I pray you are strong, brave and courageous and that your voice is loud. I pray that you never forget who you are and whose you are and that you can stand in the full confidence of who God created you to be and that you will stand firm in that regardless of what the world tells you.

And may you never forget just how deeply you are loved.

Love you my son,

Mama