May 13, 2011

Nancy Moores.

So I am sure you are slightly curious as to WHO this Nancy Moores is...well Nancy Moores is my grandma. She is the one I went to visit a few weeks ago...the one who carried my mother for 9 months...the one who lives alone in a retirement home...the one who has been single the majority of her life.  This woman is my grandmother, and I just googled her only to find that there are loads of Nancy Moores' in the world, many of whom have facebook profiles. 

And I love her to bits and bits and even more bits.  Some find her difficult, and don't get me wrong..she can be difficult, but can't we all be sometimes?  

So they set her free from the assisted living home on Tuesday, and she was SO very ready to go home!  I guess her last roommate was a terrible, 100 year-old woman that was just covered with shingles.  Makes me sad just thinking about the pain she must have been in.  So they set her free on one condition - that she would have someone come by to check on her daily.  So when I received a phone call from my grandma on Tuesday afternoon asking if I was free Wednesday morning to help her TIE her shoes I immediately said sign me up!

So this morning, I show up to her place around 8:10 - knock on the door...no answer...so I turn the door knob and discover its unlocked.  I step into her place, while saying HELLO???  Still no answer.  It was all slightly eerie and then I discovered my grandma was just lying on her bed.  For a second I thought she was still asleep and I was going to have to wake her!  So I quietly crept into her bedroom, gently touched her arm, and in my quietest voice I greeted her with a "Good morning Grandma!"

And let met tell you it WAS a good morning!  I was only there an hour, but it was a full hour and a beautiful hour.  I spent the first few minutes simply asking questions about her surgery and the last few weeks and listening to her answers.  I discovered that this woman hates being told what to do, but don't we all??  She was going on and on about all the ways people had controlled her life over the last few weeks...and I just kept thinking gosh even I would hate all of that!!  

And then we got down to business...here is the list of things we accomplished.

1.  we replaced her hearing aid batteries, 
2.  we went through some clothes my mom had bought her
3.  I forced her to try said clothes on - the winners were hung up in her closet, while the non winners were place back into the bag 
4.  I collected some clothes for washing
5.  I got rid of some toilet thing the Wellness Clinic had brought into her room
6.  We got her dressed - with pants, shirt, shoes, and all.
7.  And I even made her bed.
8.  And to finish it all off...I opened up her curtains in her place so a bit of the sun could shine through!

As I left she said..."Gosh, I feel like we have done so much this morning!"

It was a wonderful way to start my day and truly the highlight of my entire day, and I didn't hesitate to tell her that.  I left that place with the BIGGEST smile on my face and my heart just felt so very full!  I mean it's the least I can do right??  

But I think what breaks my heart way more than seeing her in pain ...is seeing her feel like she is such a burden to all of us.  To be honest - it makes me really angry that she feels that way because SOMEONE has made her feel that way.  I mean she feels she is putting me out by asking me to come over and help her TIE HER SHOES!!!  Tie her shoes...I mean c'mon it's not HER that's a burden to me...it's my own selfish self that is the true burden.  I mean I could have responded one of two ways to her request...I could have said "I am so sorry but I don't have time for you and I don't want to make the time", or I could say with a HUGE smile on my face,  "Gosh thanks for asking me...I feel so honored that you called and I am so glad that you are alive!!  I will for sure be there - no problem at all!  Can I do anything else for you??"

So I am hoping to see WAY more of her - as our time together is so very fruitful.  And I probably get even more out of it than she does!  As I skipped back to my car with the biggest smile on my face - I thought to myself...this feels SO right.  I just love being around older people ...maybe it's because they make me feel so alive??  Or maybe it's because they remind me that I shouldn't take even the simplest things for granted??  

So be thankful today ...especially for the little things - especially for being able to tie your shoelaces.

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