A Third Time

When I was pregnant with Ryan, I remember writing this blog post about the second time, about having a baby for the second time, and the truth is, I had absolutely no idea what truly awaited us.

I knew what it was like to have one child, and I knew the joy and the sleepless nights. I knew the post partum body, the c-section recovery, the breastfeeding, the pumping, the endless laundry. I knew the desire to feel needed and the reluctance that also comes with that need.

I knew how one child could change my world, myself and my marriage, but what I didn't know was just how much that second child would change the first child and how much that second child would change the overall dynamics of our family!

I had no idea what it would look like or feel like to witness my two children, this band of brothers, interact with and simply delight in each other. Nor did I know just how much I'd have to play the referee as they wrestle and climb all over each other!

I feel like having a second baby was selfish, and more for me as I had no idea yet just how much they would delight in each other, and having a third is more for them, for that sibling dynamic and that shared history and that pure delight. And to bare witness to that shared history and their silly shenanigans is such an incredible gift.

And because of all of this, there's something extra special about doing this (being pregnant and having another child) for the third time.

We are not blind to the realities or the trials of adding another member to our family, yet we willingly do it all over again because of the joy and the pure delight and the magic that is children.



And this time, I know the chaos and the fact that boys are constantly in motion.

And I love that motion.

I love their boundless energy.

Don't get me wrong, it's exhausting, and I'm shattered by the end of the day, we all are, but we willingly do it all a third time because it's all worth it, the exhaustion is worth the joy that comes each day.

And I love that I'm officially and fully a boy mom. God gave me exactly what I needed as He graciously prepared me for this boy mom title, but truly I always thought I'd be a boy mom.

And I love that we've added another boy to our crew, to this band of brothers.

I love witnessing the brother relationship unfold.

I love just sitting back and watching them...together. I love listening to the things they say, the way their imaginations run wild, and the way they encourage and spur each other on.

And their laughter is contagious.

Just tonight, the boys were running through the sprinkler, and I was washing dishes in the kitchen, and I just had to stop and watch them through the window as they just laughed and laughed and lifted up the sprinkler to spray it directly at the other.

And it was just beautiful.

The sibling dynamic is such a beautiful thing to witness.

Witnessing their sheer delight in each other is pure magic.

And this is what I'm most excited about for baby brother. We're not just adding to our family, but we're bringing him into this beautiful band of brothers.

And he has absolutely no idea what he'll be coming home to! And let's be honest, neither do I. But we can't wait to have Conor in our home and to officially begin our journey as a family of five.

And Ryan's already taking his big brother role very seriously!