I always have a choice.

Last weekend, I took time, like I normally do on the weekend, to clean the house.  Our house is a 2 bedroom, 770 square foot home, with just one bathroom - so it really doesn't take long to clean, but it's just about finding the time to do it.

And I normally tidy things up a bit before I even begin to clean.  So I tucked Jack's toys away in their usual spots and I put the dvds back on the shelf.  I swept the floor and cleaned the table and wiped down Jack's highchair.  The child was napping so I figured it would stay this way for a short while - at least until I finished cleaning right?

So I finish tidying up and began cleaning...cleaned the living room, the kitchen, the dining room, and was moving onto the bedrooms when Jack woke up.  Peter went in to get him...and I finished cleaning the bedrooms, and walked out into the hall to start on the bathroom.  And I couldn't believe my eyes...it had only been a matter of minutes and already chaos filled the living room.  What the heck??  How did that happen so fast?  I had just spent time putting all those items away.  How did he get his little hands on them so fast.

The dvds were back on the carpet, the toys were all over the floor, his highchair was a mess, crumbs were everywhere.

Let's just say it looked a little something like this.

And it was in that moment that I realized I had a choice - I could cry, which I had already kind of started to do, or I could laugh. Let's just say I chose both - I started to cry out of frustration and pure annoyance, feeling as though my efforts were for naught, as my husband looked at me with so much tenderness.  I started to get mad.  Started saying...how can you (husband) let this happen, I just spent time cleaning, blah, blah, blah - I'm sure you get the point.

And I was crying, I mean I had tears people.  I had just spent time tidying up this mess, and I was annoyed that nothing was in my control anymore.  I mean I turn my back for a few minutes, and bam, chaos appears.  And I was mad...I wanted to be mad at my husband, but I realized that wasn't really fair as none of it was his mess.  None of this was his doing - it was all the little person's doing that resides with us.

And that's when I started laughing.  In a matter of seconds my tears and frustration turned to laughter and joy.  It was all rather freeing to be honest - to realize that I had a choice.  I could stay mad, annoyed, frustrated, or I could see the humor in it all and get down on the floor with the little person in our house and embrace the chaos!

It was such a beautiful moment for me - to realize that I always have a choice.  And I hope that next time, as I'm sure there will be a next time, the laughter comes before the tears, the joy before the frustration.  As I can honestly say, I would trade a clean house for this little person and his chaos any day!

Until next time,

Malia

Routine.

I married a man that isn't a huge fan of routines. People that are really stuck in their ways and set in their routines kind of drive him wild.  Don't get me wrong, he loves those people but he hates their routines. I think it's because he wins the award for being the most flexible and adaptable person I know, and he never wanted to be a parent whose schedule was centered on a baby's sleep schedule. But that was before we were parents, and now I can honestly say we get it.  We completely get why a child's bed time is important to honor because if the child doesn't sleep good neither does the parent. Unfortunately, there isn't a mute button when your child wakes up five times in the night (a bit of an exaggeration but you get the point).

There are so many books out there with so many different philosophies on schedules and routines, and Peter and I just weren't interested in being bound to the babies schedule but we also didn’t want to be the ones that dictated it either, think they call that a parent led schedule.  I truly feel like the last few months we have just studied our child, his cries, his naps, his bed time, etc., and we started to see a pattern so we simply nurtured and encouraged that pattern.

I must say having a routine is amazing simply because it helps us to problem solve during the day…oh he must be tired because he normally naps around this time, oh he must be hungry, it’s been so many hours since he last ate, etc.  Right now, he generally eats every 4 hours during the day, with rice cereal in the late morning, rice cereal in the evening, and maybe a banana treat in the afternoon if he’s up for it!  And he naps 2 times a day – 2-2.5 hours after waking up he naps for an hour and then in the afternoon, a few hours after his second feed, he naps for 1.5-2 hours.  When he’s going to bed around the same time and waking up around the same time in the morning, it’s easier to predict his naps during the day.  It has truly been one of the best things for us, allowing some predictability within this realm of unpredictability, allowing for some sanity amidst the insanity.

And not only do we have a routine for Jack, but we also have a routine for ourselves. I have a coworker, who rotates dinner meals with her husband – she cooks one night, he cooks the other, etc, and I suggested this to Peter.  I don’t mind cooking and I don’t even mind doing the grocery shopping, but I do hate being the one to come up with all the dinner ideas.  So one afternoon, I threw the dinner rotation suggestion out there, and Peter was a little reluctant and said he would think about it.  The man loves to cook, and he doesn’t mind it at all, but once again, it’s a routine, and like I said, he’s not a huge fan of routines.  So when I received an email from him at work stating that he was in, I was slightly shocked.

And so our routine began, with a few exceptions of course, which Peter clearly stated in his initial email to me.

The email word for word -

Ok so I am on board with this dinner malarky, but I have a few rules/suggestions…
1)You cant just say you're making oatmeal
2)We make most of them paleo, or close to it
3)You can only veto one of my meals
4)not sure what else.

I was thinking of making chicken salad (nuts, avocado, tomato, spinach, chicken, carrot, apple, cucumber and pepper) do we have the last two things?

And so it began...salad for dinner and our dinner routines.  It has been so fun to see Peter get all creative with his dinners, and the man is even looking up recipes!!  I love him. 

Here are a few of our creations - and I have even been making my own salad dressings!

I should start posting some of our favorite recipes on the blog.  Right now we are loving eating things from our garden (squash, green beans, blueberries, snap peas, eggs, etc) and chocolate banana Popsicles, definitely not from the garden.

Do any of you have any routine suggestions? or things that you and your family do to keep sane amidst the craziness that can become your life?  I would love to hear!

A Day in the Life.

Some friends recently asked me what a typical day looks like for me now, and I found myself struggling to come up with something that sounded sophisticated.  The reality is, everything takes me a bit longer these days, and let's be honest, sometimes I don't even get up out of bed until 10 AM.  And even when I do get up, it's simply to make myself a cup of coffee and to gather all the things, like my computer, a book, those thank you notes I keep putting off, etc, that I will want next to me when I get BACK into bed.  And some days I will stay in our bedroom, under the covers, responding to emails, feeding the baby, cuddling the baby, trying to soothe the baby in hopes that the baby will go back to sleep so I can get back to those emails and maybe even read some pages in my stack of books. 

Truly though - this time with Jack has been such a blessing, and yes, I am utterly exhausted, but I cherish those times when his eyes are open, but let's be honest, I also cherish those times when his eyes are closed.

So back to the question...what does a typical day look like?  And what do I do with all this time that I now have?

Honestly, I don't feel like I have a ton of free time on my hands, and I suppose all those moms and new moms out there can relate to this.  I think I envisioned baby would sleep ALOT and baby does sleep alot, but he's awake alot too. And even when he is asleep, you just don't have the energy to run all those errands or do all those little tasks around the house that you have on your to do list.  

Anyhow, I made a point over the last few days to document what a day in the life of Malia and Jack looks like, and I must say I am extremely pleased with all of our accomplishments as of late.

So lets see...in no particular order.

I feed baby which takes some time - first I have to pump in order to make it all happen, and then we have the bottle routine and I have to measure out the right proportion for the bigger bottle so that I can add his extra special similac to it.  Then I measure it out again and pour it into the little bottles.  And then the little guy gets fed.

Bottle time!

And then he sleeps....

and sleeps...

Some days I do laundry, which seems to take me forever these days.  And the last few days, little buddy has peed on BOTH our duvet covers - the one in our room and the one in the guest room.  So I have done two loads of laundry in two days and it always takes me a few days to put those duvet covers back on.  I hate doing that!

one done...

and one more to go...

I vacuum - This is my living room with a freshly vacummed carpet.  Sure makes mama happy and baby slept right through it all!  

I get the mail and open packages when they come...

Some days I take little buddy out for a walk...let's just say it had been SO long since I had worn tennis shoes, that I forgot I bought new ones a few weeks before they told me to stop exercising!  

I swear there is a baby in there...

And we visited the cemetery where my Uncle (he died when he was 18 - I never met him) and great grandparents are buried.  And I couldn't help but snap a photo, some may say it's slightly morbid, but quite frankly I don't care! :)

And I try to read books...the Rise of Nine isn't all that good to be honest, but now that I have started it, I have to finish it!  And I have loads of pregnancy, childbirth books that I am working my way through - these are just a few of the books in my possession.

I bake ...banana bread these days and I made butterscotch oatmeal cookies that I burned.  Oh yeah, I burned the banana bread too!  Don't worry, we don't discriminate in this house and my husband insists he actually prefers the taste of burnt banana bread.  I, on the other hand, do not.

I pay bills and inquire about bills that we are starting to receive.

I write thank you notes...

And do dishes...and did I say I pump??

And sometimes...just sometimes, I take a shower!  But I won't leave you with a photo of that.

Anyhow, and that concludes a day in the life of ...and now my friends, I think it's time for me to close my eyes and begin the day all over again.

Love,

Malia and Little Buddy