We have some friends that had a baby recently, and we went to visit them a few weeks ago. The first thing they said as we walked through the door was, "Please tell us night time gets easier...Jack's sleeping through the night right??"
And Peter and I broke the news to them slowly...."He's not sleeping through the night yet, but night times do get easier simply because you get use to the sleepless nights."
It all becomes your new normal, and you forget what it was like to have a night where your sleep wasn't interrupted by a hungry babe. You forget what it was like to sleep past 6 AM. You forget what it was like to lay in bed all day.
I forget...and the sleep deprivation becomes your new normal, and you begin to learn how to function with very little sleep. Extending grace becomes your new normal. Asking for help becomes your new normal.
And eventually you forget what your life was like before the little human invaded it. And you may not be thriving, but you certainly are surviving...what more can you ask for?
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I wrote that back in October - and it has been sitting in my drafts for the last 7 months! I can now say that my child is now sleeping through the night like a champ. And I still go to bed far too late and I still wake up far earlier than I'd like to. But there are mornings that I wake up before Jack, and I don't even know what to do with myself. And sometimes, I'm just counting down the minutes till the little man wakes up. I love being his mom and the sleep deprivation - worth it. It's all worth it! And I think I can say with confidence that we are past the survival mode, and we finally have a rhythm to our lives. So to all those new mamas out there...it does get easier. It gets a whole lot easier. I promise!
Showing posts with label baby. Show all posts
Showing posts with label baby. Show all posts
May 3, 2014
December 4, 2013
I always have a choice.
Last weekend, I took time, like I normally do on the weekend, to clean the house. Our house is a 2 bedroom, 770 square foot home, with just one bathroom - so it really doesn't take long to clean, but it's just about finding the time to do it.
And I normally tidy things up a bit before I even begin to clean. So I tucked Jack's toys away in their usual spots and I put the dvds back on the shelf. I swept the floor and cleaned the table and wiped down Jack's highchair. The child was napping so I figured it would stay this way for a short while - at least until I finished cleaning right?
So I finish tidying up and began cleaning...cleaned the living room, the kitchen, the dining room, and was moving onto the bedrooms when Jack woke up. Peter went in to get him...and I finished cleaning the bedrooms, and walked out into the hall to start on the bathroom. And I couldn't believe my eyes...it had only been a matter of minutes and already chaos filled the living room. What the heck?? How did that happen so fast? I had just spent time putting all those items away. How did he get his little hands on them so fast.
The dvds were back on the carpet, the toys were all over the floor, his highchair was a mess, crumbs were everywhere.
Let's just say it looked a little something like this.
And it was in that moment that I realized I had a choice - I could cry, which I had already kind of started to do, or I could laugh. Let's just say I chose both - I started to cry out of frustration and pure annoyance, feeling as though my efforts were for naught, as my husband looked at me with so much tenderness. I started to get mad. Started saying...how can you (husband) let this happen, I just spent time cleaning, blah, blah, blah - I'm sure you get the point.
And I was crying, I mean I had tears people. I had just spent time tidying up this mess, and I was annoyed that nothing was in my control anymore. I mean I turn my back for a few minutes, and bam, chaos appears. And I was mad...I wanted to be mad at my husband, but I realized that wasn't really fair as none of it was his mess. None of this was his doing - it was all the little person's doing that resides with us.
And that's when I started laughing. In a matter of seconds my tears and frustration turned to laughter and joy. It was all rather freeing to be honest - to realize that I had a choice. I could stay mad, annoyed, frustrated, or I could see the humor in it all and get down on the floor with the little person in our house and embrace the chaos!
It was such a beautiful moment for me - to realize that I always have a choice. And I hope that next time, as I'm sure there will be a next time, the laughter comes before the tears, the joy before the frustration. As I can honestly say, I would trade a clean house for this little person and his chaos any day!
Until next time,
Malia
And I normally tidy things up a bit before I even begin to clean. So I tucked Jack's toys away in their usual spots and I put the dvds back on the shelf. I swept the floor and cleaned the table and wiped down Jack's highchair. The child was napping so I figured it would stay this way for a short while - at least until I finished cleaning right?
So I finish tidying up and began cleaning...cleaned the living room, the kitchen, the dining room, and was moving onto the bedrooms when Jack woke up. Peter went in to get him...and I finished cleaning the bedrooms, and walked out into the hall to start on the bathroom. And I couldn't believe my eyes...it had only been a matter of minutes and already chaos filled the living room. What the heck?? How did that happen so fast? I had just spent time putting all those items away. How did he get his little hands on them so fast.
The dvds were back on the carpet, the toys were all over the floor, his highchair was a mess, crumbs were everywhere.
Let's just say it looked a little something like this.
And it was in that moment that I realized I had a choice - I could cry, which I had already kind of started to do, or I could laugh. Let's just say I chose both - I started to cry out of frustration and pure annoyance, feeling as though my efforts were for naught, as my husband looked at me with so much tenderness. I started to get mad. Started saying...how can you (husband) let this happen, I just spent time cleaning, blah, blah, blah - I'm sure you get the point.
And I was crying, I mean I had tears people. I had just spent time tidying up this mess, and I was annoyed that nothing was in my control anymore. I mean I turn my back for a few minutes, and bam, chaos appears. And I was mad...I wanted to be mad at my husband, but I realized that wasn't really fair as none of it was his mess. None of this was his doing - it was all the little person's doing that resides with us.
And that's when I started laughing. In a matter of seconds my tears and frustration turned to laughter and joy. It was all rather freeing to be honest - to realize that I had a choice. I could stay mad, annoyed, frustrated, or I could see the humor in it all and get down on the floor with the little person in our house and embrace the chaos!
It was such a beautiful moment for me - to realize that I always have a choice. And I hope that next time, as I'm sure there will be a next time, the laughter comes before the tears, the joy before the frustration. As I can honestly say, I would trade a clean house for this little person and his chaos any day!
Until next time,
Malia
July 23, 2013
Growing up.
As you saw yesterday in Jack's six month post, our little buddy is growing up! He is no longer the teeny, tiny, fragile newborn we brought home from the hospital. And as I watch Peter toss Jack up in the air and as I listen to Jack squeal with joy, I am reminded of the teeny, tiny fragile baby he once was.
And it has only been 6 months...that's all.
And....those six months have gone so fast. So Fast.
A dear friend reminded me of this today, and she posted this on my Facebook wall this morning.
"This made me cry this morning. I know we're not quite in the 'apple slices' phase yet but can you believe our boys are 6 months old? Where did the time go?!"
And we may not be in the apple slices phase, but we have entered into the realm of the mooshy banana phase, and my baby is slowly exiting the baby phase, and I get it. I, too, am all sorts of emotional...Always. My poor husband.
Well the THIS she is referring to is an excerpt from a blog post by Brian Sorrell who writes a blog called Dadding Full time, and this post was featured on the Hands Free Revolution facebook page. I highly recommend logging into facebook right - search for the Hands Free Revolution facebook page - and click like - you won't regret it. I know I haven't!
And without further ado...
"One piece after another, he gets closer to the bottom of the bowl. There was a time when I would secretly wish him to finish fast so I could get out of his room and get on with my night. Not so these days. Like every night, he'll get through the apple slices at his usual leisurely pace. He'll lay his head down and ask for one last cuddle. Lately, he grabs me with both arms around my neck, pulls my cheek to his, and whispers in my ear that he loves me as I relish his soft skin against my ruddy old face. I don't lament my getting older so much as I lament his. I want this to last, but it can only go on so long.
One day he will lay his head down with someone else. Someone will have filled my shoes - made him laugh when he felt let down, let him cry it out when there was nothing left to say. Someone will accept his flaws, temper his obsessions, keep him in check with a firm but fair hand - a referee stepping in to keep his fight moving forward like it should.
These are the moments, watching him crunch his slices of apple, giggling at the crooked smile that each one becomes, looking back at me with his cinnamon eyes, and soft cheeks puffing as he chomps away. This is parenting, I think to myself. Me. Noodle. Settling down together. And suddenly I'm flooded by all the times I think one day I'll have my life back - but, this is the moment I'll be reaching for later."
Beautiful. Simply beautiful.
First, I don't know what I love more.
The fact that he refers to his son as "Noodle."
Or the fact that I get it on so many levels.
"There was a time when I would secretly wish him to finish fast so I could get out of his room and get on with my night."
Wow - this one really hit home. I know for a fact I have thought this. C'mon Jack, aren't you done yet? Mom's got things to do! And I am not proud when I say I could win an award for multitasking and breastfeeding at the same time. Oh there's laundry to fold, a house to tidy, a bed to make - I can do it! I have an extra hand! It is hard for me to just sit and rest. And in the middle of the night, when Jack wakes up, and the house is dark and quiet, and when I'm far too tired to do anything else but lay with my baby and feed him, I'm convicted of my need to "do". I'm convicted of my selfishness. And last night, after waking up for the second time with Jack, I realized my perspective had changed as I squeezed my son a little tighter, and pulled him a little closer to my chest. I brushed my lips over the top of his head, inhaled his sweet smell, and stroked his little back. And as his hand grazed my chest, and as his soft cheek stroked mine, and as his chest rose and fell, I was convicted. How easy it is to run through life without taking a moment to pause, cherish, and appreciate these little moments.
"I don't lament my getting older so much as I lament his."
Ahh...this makes my heart ache. Jack is growing up so fast! I know it sounds silly, but it's so true. In a few short months, he will no longer be a baby. In a few short months, he will be crawling, walking, talking. In a few short months, he will have outgrown all of his baby clothes. I don't lament my getting older as much as I lament his - I get it.
"And suddenly I'm flooded by all the times I think one day I'll have my life back - but, this is the moment I'll be reaching for later."
Don't think I haven't thought this exact thought..."One day I'll have my life back." So much of my life right now is centered on raising Jack, feeding Jack, entertaining Jack, caring for Jack. If I'm not with him, I'm thinking about him - his next feeding, his nap time, his bath time, his diaper laundry (this is what happens when you use clothe diapers!). And it's exhausting at times, and I'm so thankful for the way Peter partners so beautifully with me through it all. And don't get me wrong, I love this life, but I'd be lying if I told you I never thought about what it would be like to only have myself to think of. And I know there will come a time when Jack no longer needs me quite the same way he does now, and I'm sure, in just a few short years, months even, I will be reaching for these sweet baby moments that I currently find myself experiencing.
Here's to cherishing each and every day and treasuring each and every stage as we watch our little man grow up!
And it has only been 6 months...that's all.
And....those six months have gone so fast. So Fast.
A dear friend reminded me of this today, and she posted this on my Facebook wall this morning.
"This made me cry this morning. I know we're not quite in the 'apple slices' phase yet but can you believe our boys are 6 months old? Where did the time go?!"
And we may not be in the apple slices phase, but we have entered into the realm of the mooshy banana phase, and my baby is slowly exiting the baby phase, and I get it. I, too, am all sorts of emotional...Always. My poor husband.
Well the THIS she is referring to is an excerpt from a blog post by Brian Sorrell who writes a blog called Dadding Full time, and this post was featured on the Hands Free Revolution facebook page. I highly recommend logging into facebook right - search for the Hands Free Revolution facebook page - and click like - you won't regret it. I know I haven't!
And without further ado...
"One piece after another, he gets closer to the bottom of the bowl. There was a time when I would secretly wish him to finish fast so I could get out of his room and get on with my night. Not so these days. Like every night, he'll get through the apple slices at his usual leisurely pace. He'll lay his head down and ask for one last cuddle. Lately, he grabs me with both arms around my neck, pulls my cheek to his, and whispers in my ear that he loves me as I relish his soft skin against my ruddy old face. I don't lament my getting older so much as I lament his. I want this to last, but it can only go on so long.
One day he will lay his head down with someone else. Someone will have filled my shoes - made him laugh when he felt let down, let him cry it out when there was nothing left to say. Someone will accept his flaws, temper his obsessions, keep him in check with a firm but fair hand - a referee stepping in to keep his fight moving forward like it should.
These are the moments, watching him crunch his slices of apple, giggling at the crooked smile that each one becomes, looking back at me with his cinnamon eyes, and soft cheeks puffing as he chomps away. This is parenting, I think to myself. Me. Noodle. Settling down together. And suddenly I'm flooded by all the times I think one day I'll have my life back - but, this is the moment I'll be reaching for later."
Beautiful. Simply beautiful.
First, I don't know what I love more.
The fact that he refers to his son as "Noodle."
Or the fact that I get it on so many levels.
"There was a time when I would secretly wish him to finish fast so I could get out of his room and get on with my night."
Wow - this one really hit home. I know for a fact I have thought this. C'mon Jack, aren't you done yet? Mom's got things to do! And I am not proud when I say I could win an award for multitasking and breastfeeding at the same time. Oh there's laundry to fold, a house to tidy, a bed to make - I can do it! I have an extra hand! It is hard for me to just sit and rest. And in the middle of the night, when Jack wakes up, and the house is dark and quiet, and when I'm far too tired to do anything else but lay with my baby and feed him, I'm convicted of my need to "do". I'm convicted of my selfishness. And last night, after waking up for the second time with Jack, I realized my perspective had changed as I squeezed my son a little tighter, and pulled him a little closer to my chest. I brushed my lips over the top of his head, inhaled his sweet smell, and stroked his little back. And as his hand grazed my chest, and as his soft cheek stroked mine, and as his chest rose and fell, I was convicted. How easy it is to run through life without taking a moment to pause, cherish, and appreciate these little moments.
"I don't lament my getting older so much as I lament his."
Ahh...this makes my heart ache. Jack is growing up so fast! I know it sounds silly, but it's so true. In a few short months, he will no longer be a baby. In a few short months, he will be crawling, walking, talking. In a few short months, he will have outgrown all of his baby clothes. I don't lament my getting older as much as I lament his - I get it.
"And suddenly I'm flooded by all the times I think one day I'll have my life back - but, this is the moment I'll be reaching for later."
Don't think I haven't thought this exact thought..."One day I'll have my life back." So much of my life right now is centered on raising Jack, feeding Jack, entertaining Jack, caring for Jack. If I'm not with him, I'm thinking about him - his next feeding, his nap time, his bath time, his diaper laundry (this is what happens when you use clothe diapers!). And it's exhausting at times, and I'm so thankful for the way Peter partners so beautifully with me through it all. And don't get me wrong, I love this life, but I'd be lying if I told you I never thought about what it would be like to only have myself to think of. And I know there will come a time when Jack no longer needs me quite the same way he does now, and I'm sure, in just a few short years, months even, I will be reaching for these sweet baby moments that I currently find myself experiencing.
Here's to cherishing each and every day and treasuring each and every stage as we watch our little man grow up!
June 5, 2013
This Morning.
Well it's only 8:15, and I've already been up for THREE hours! I found this little photo online a few days ago, and it couldn't be more true. I mean sleeping in for us now is something like 7, and this very RARELY happens. How is it that we ended up with an exceptionally early riser - we are lucky if we can get him to sleep until 6. And maybe this will change, but Peter and I aren't counting on it!
So as I said, it's 8:15, and I have already done a load of laundry, washed some dishes, made myself breakfast, sent off a few emails, crossed a few things off my work to do list, fed Jack twice, put him down for a nap, changed two diapers, and started on dinner.
So as I said, it's 8:15, and I have already done a load of laundry, washed some dishes, made myself breakfast, sent off a few emails, crossed a few things off my work to do list, fed Jack twice, put him down for a nap, changed two diapers, and started on dinner.
We will be having stuffed red peppers, roasted veggies, and a salad,
that is if I can get myself to the shop to buy a few things. So yes, we don't sleep in anymore, but I do get quite a bit accomplished in the mornings now!
Happy Wednesday everyone! It's going to be another gorgeous day in Seattle.
love,
Malia
October 4, 2012
Little Buddy: 20 weeks!
Little buddy is 20 weeks and a few days, maybe more! I have been able to feel him moving more and more with each passing day. I wish my stomach was translucent so I could see him moving around in there, but I suppose that would be slightly strange! I am touching my stomach all the time, trying to feel a solid kick or a little squirm, and hoping that he lasts long enough for his Dad to feel him moving, but alas, it hasn't happened yet.
I am at the pregnancy midpoint, which is simply crazy, and it's crazy to think that baby just gets bigger from here on it, which ultimately means, my stomach will stretch to unbelievable lengths, and I too will be getting bigger from here on out. I definitely have a bit of a bump, but I'm looking forward to the day when it is noticeably distinguishable. They say that my hair and nails should be growing noticeably faster and thicker. Well let's just say, I got my haircut last week, and I haven't noticed much of a difference, and well...my nails are still short. I suppose it might help if I were to stop biting them!
Little buddy now weighs about 10.5 ounces, and he's around 6.5 inches long from head to bottom and about 10 inches from head to heel, and he's the length of a banana. They say that the top of my uterus is about level with my belly button, which probably explains the bit of growth in the baby bump arena. Also, Baby's swallowing more these days, practicing for his digestive system.
I have not been sleeping well - waking up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, or to change sleeping positions, and that is just NOT fun! I woke up twice last night to little taps on my shoulder - and it was Peter informing me that I was sleeping on my back. Bless that man! So glad he's back, but can't wait for him to overcome his jet lag, so that he's sleeping through the night and not tapping me on the shoulder. Guess you aren't suppose to be sleeping on your back and unfortunately I informed my husband of this fact. Let it be known - I am a major back sleeper. And it makes me sad to think that when I sleep on my back the weight of my uterus is pressing down on some major blood vessels and possibly preventing blood flow to myself and the baby. Little does the husband know that my body wakes me up before long anyways, forcing me to change positions. I'm imagining this whole sleeping thing isn't going to get any better as time goes on, is it? I suppose I may have to start taking naps to catch up on the sleep I'm missing out on!
Another thing I have noticed lately is that I have this burning sensation in my throat. It's happened twice now, and I'm thinking it's heartburn or acid reflux? But I don't even know! I have never experienced anything like this before. And I have definitely had my bouts of dizziness when getting up from bed or the couch or something like that. And I experienced my first leg cramp - it was a calf cramp, and oh man it hurt! It literally woke me up from a deep sleep on Saturday and I didn't know what to do - it hurt so bad! I thought it could have been from the heels I wore for 7 hours the night before, which could still be the case I suppose? I never wear heels and my legs simply were not use to it, especially those calves, but I think the whole pregnancy thing may have contributed something to it. Who knows! Still no swelling that I have noticed, but my belly button does look a bit different.
Still wearing my pre-pregnancy clothes, which consists of ALOT of dresses, leggings, tights, and boots/flats. I have noticed that my jackets and sweaters are a bit more tight across the chest and tummy and not so easy to button!
We have our big ultrasound today, and Peter and I can't wait to see little buddy! We have been waiting weeks for this appointment - it will be crazy to see how much he has grown in 5 weeks. And although we think we know little buddy's gender, I can't wait for the tech to confirm it! Stay tuned!
Until next week,
Malia
September 19, 2012
Small Spaces.
I have started brainstorming baby room ideas and doing all sorts of research on ideas for SMALL spaces - considering our house is fairly small, 770 sq feet small. And it is a two bedroom, one bathroom home, so baby could have his own room, but if I'm completely honest, it makes me a little sad to think about turning our guest bedroom into a baby room. I know, I know, it's what most people would do, but I just can't bring myself to do it...so guess what??
Little buddy will be spending his days in the guest bedroom closet. I know it may sound crazy and please don't call child protective services on us, but the closet is definitely big enough for a crib and a changing table to come down from the wall and that would still leave us with space to hang a few of his treasured clothing items in the closet.
Thus, we are in search of a mini crib - something that can fit in the closet and move easily from room to room (wheels would be nice). I have found a few that I like, such as the Stokke Sleepi or the Grayson Mini Crib, or the Alma Mini Crib - pictures posted in order below. I think the top one (Stokke Sleepi) is the most expensive, but this is the only one that converts to various sizes. The other two look EXTREMELY similar to one another and I think they are fairly comparable in price as well. However, both seem fairly small, but I suppose that is what we are looking for. But the most common complaint with those two is that they are so small and the baby outgrows them way sooner than they had anticipated. But let's be honest, I can't imagine our baby is going to be all that long in length - so it probably won't be a problem. And I do love the changing table on the crib component that the Alma Crib offers!
And I have been perusing pinterest for all sorts of small baby room ideas - here are some of my favorite ideas! Love the little curtain on the closet door - we will most likely be taking off the door of our little closet and replacing it with something like this. I also love the idea of the changing table over the crib, maybe I should add this to my crib requirements? And what a great idea for the laundry bag on the door. I also love the idea of the changing table coming down from the wall - great use of space! And then lastly we have the crib in the closet. I believe our closet is quite a bit deeper than this one, and I'm pretty sure we won't be painting it this color or hanging those types of things on the wall - but I think it was the first photo that inspired my closet idea.
Little buddy will be spending his days in the guest bedroom closet. I know it may sound crazy and please don't call child protective services on us, but the closet is definitely big enough for a crib and a changing table to come down from the wall and that would still leave us with space to hang a few of his treasured clothing items in the closet.
Thus, we are in search of a mini crib - something that can fit in the closet and move easily from room to room (wheels would be nice). I have found a few that I like, such as the Stokke Sleepi or the Grayson Mini Crib, or the Alma Mini Crib - pictures posted in order below. I think the top one (Stokke Sleepi) is the most expensive, but this is the only one that converts to various sizes. The other two look EXTREMELY similar to one another and I think they are fairly comparable in price as well. However, both seem fairly small, but I suppose that is what we are looking for. But the most common complaint with those two is that they are so small and the baby outgrows them way sooner than they had anticipated. But let's be honest, I can't imagine our baby is going to be all that long in length - so it probably won't be a problem. And I do love the changing table on the crib component that the Alma Crib offers!
And I have been perusing pinterest for all sorts of small baby room ideas - here are some of my favorite ideas! Love the little curtain on the closet door - we will most likely be taking off the door of our little closet and replacing it with something like this. I also love the idea of the changing table over the crib, maybe I should add this to my crib requirements? And what a great idea for the laundry bag on the door. I also love the idea of the changing table coming down from the wall - great use of space! And then lastly we have the crib in the closet. I believe our closet is quite a bit deeper than this one, and I'm pretty sure we won't be painting it this color or hanging those types of things on the wall - but I think it was the first photo that inspired my closet idea.
Anyhow, there you have it...I would love to hear your space saving ideas if you have any!
xoxo,
Malia
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